Accepting Moments As They Are

Accepting life as it is can be key to living mindfully in the present. Take a moment to think about how you respond to situations in life that did not go the way you had planned. How many times do you use terms like “I should have…”, “ I wish… could have happened”, or  “I could have… if ….didn’t happen”?

Over time due to disappointments in life most of us have been programmed to want things to be different then what they are, or state that we wish they never should have happened.  When we do that we are judging the moment to be “not good enough”, as well as placing blame on those involved (including ourselves) who were “not good enough” to have gotten into the situation. When we resist what is happening in the present moment we become upset, frustrated or become overly critical. Practicing acceptance changes that cycle!

Acceptance does not mean that you approve of what happened, it just means that the moment happened. Each moment is as it is, sometimes there doesn’t have to be a hidden meaning or agenda. By shifting your attention from judging the moment as good, bad, nice or mean to simply noticing what is happening is emotionally freeing.

The next time something happens in your life that does not go your way, stop and consciously remove the judgment from your view of the event. Just pay attention to the details that happened and anything you have control over moving forward.

For example:

• If it is raining and you must leave the house:
  • The judgmental version would be complaining about the rain and allowing it to taint your entire day.
  • Acceptance and acknowledging the moment would be noticing the rain, putting on a jacket and shoes appropriate for the weather and grabbing an umbrella on your way out the door
• If you get into a minor car accident:
  • A judgmental reaction would be placing blame, yelling and freaking out—complaining about how horrible the experience was for the rest of the day.
  • Acceptance would be checking for injuries, contacting the police for an accident report and reporting the events as you remember them. Acceptance for the rest of the day would be practicing self care.

Accepting the moment as it is can take a lot of conscious practice. If you need some support getting started or staying on track come in for a few therapy sessions, I am here to help!

Sending well wishes!